My name is John,

I’m 43 years old, husband, father, small business owner, radio DJ, podcaster, and I have Multiple Sclerosis.

I created the What’s The Matter With Me? Podcast to share what I’m going through.


I believe in using the transformational power of creativity to achieve social justice. Joseph Beuys once famously claimed that, “Each person is an artist.” In the words of the Spanish poet Antonio Machado, “Wanderer, your footprints are/ the path, and nothing else;/ wanderer, there is no path,/ the path is made by walking.” My work consists of public interactions that create new conditions in the community.

I have multiple sclerosis and that affects my life and work in many ways. I am the host of What’s The Matter With Me?, a podcast where I share my experiences, challenges and triumphs as a patient with MS. The podcast develops my Disability Consciousness and bridges me with my caregivers, doctors, the disabled community, and community-at-large.

If each person is an artist, and we create the road by walking, then it is up to us to create the world we want to see.

I have that kind of voice that’s like “I’m recovering”
  • Shoutouts to Rocky. She told me she read a peer reviewed study that two consecutive nights of peanut butter a and jelly sandwiches can cause covid
  • My taste and smell is all messed up
  • We missed open house at the ki9d’s school
  • Kyle Damon Ranson’s project is years and the record is called rats
  • I bought it on Friday, Wet Leg too
I’m tweeting myself back to health
i got covid
i got covid
i had a birthday dinner and didn’t wear a mask
  • Shout outs to the ceramicist brian R. Jones who likes the longer episodes- he makes the stuff at
  • he hangs out in a ceramics studio. i attended Alfred University for a single semester and I got him and Steve there
  • try to calm down and go slower
  • I revisited the last night for dinner journal, it had been 13 months. Last night For dinner we had left over meatloaf and martini’s made with cheap gin but at least there was plenty of it
  • 5 oz gin to 1.5oz dry vermouth, garnished with banana peppers. it wasn’t very good
  • me & my wife: Ronin commonsense media sounds like the answer is, sounds fine/ no
  • bunch of ex-govt spies fighting over a briefcase
  • went over it last time: Elon musk is named after a smell, On the other hand John Hoppin is the name of a less wealthy and less popular smell that doesnt own twitter
  • I’m riding the exercise bike 2-3x per week
  • I got asked by another parent in San Leandro if it had happened to me recently and for a moment i wasnt sure if they meant the wheelchair or MS
  • i told them that i had the wheelchair almost a full year before i would ride it around in public
  • it was recommended to me by an occupational therapist at the stanford neuroscience a couple years before that
  • she told me it would help me get there- not spend my energy to get there
  • i’m tired of falling and hitting my head and having to get staples in my head
  • Reading foreign cuisine cookbooks- Ethiopian smoked milk or water
  • Going to dinner at a Moroccan restaurant on Saturday
  • My wife wanted to support the idea of journeying to Ethiopia
  • Roger Maris visited JFK in the white house in his capacity as MS Society’s national campaign co chairman in 1962
  • Last night for dinner and the night before i had pb&j for dinner
  • went to my 2nd kfjc meeting since corona, raided the spliff bin
  • Wet leg, kyle ranson
  • Took the kids to baseball, made dinner, all by myself but i had help. The burger place closed
  • i was afraid i would lose my license
  • Dmv worked
  • Hayward dmv was cool
  • the guy had a hat that said oldies car club and the bull was scrunched up like anthrax – he told me i should work there
  • so i’m afraid tommy lee jones is going to pull me out of line so he can show me some of his techniques
  • ignoring disabled people all the way up to euthanizing them are on a spectrum together (like the way microagression and out right aggression) are both kinds of discrimination
  • Need advice about a wheelchair lift for the car, i know there a re listeners who use wheelchairs, i need to get a machine that takes my chair out of the car bc i dont like someone doing it who is either a woman or older than me.
  • its for the optics
  • Have you heard the sound of the atmosphere dragging across the Earth
  • I went to birthday dinner in San Francisco
  • I had a 3 hour mri
  • Then i had rods drilled into my jaw
birthday special cover
birthday special cover
It’s the What’s The Matter With Me? Podcast Birthday Special Episode, featuring Elon Musk, Chowhound & chicken sandwiches

Thanks for tuning in to the What’s The Matter With Me? Podcast “Birthday Special”

My birthday is coming up so let’s have a Birthday Special episode that’s mostly about chicken sandwiches and twitter. Are you all strapped in? Great- let’s get to the rundown:!

  • It’s going to be my birthday next week and I want to go to eat at a Korean restaurant that was sold last year.. Instagram says it looks the same, but there’s no BBQ in the pictures.
  • Instead, it looks like I’m going to have a fried chicken sandwich for lunch on my birthday
  • Chowhound is gone and the internet is useless without it
  • The sink in my kitchen is out of order, my birthday is coming up and these were the reasons I needed Chowhound
  • Thank god for our cooking group
  • You get out what you put into life, reggae sing lyric
  • “I’m a cat” Twitter recap
  • Elon Musk is one of the the richest people in the world and he is named after a smell, and it’s not really a good one
  • My son heard some dancehall reggae on the radio and he asked is this yentelman ?
  • Shout out to my neighbor who thinks Hoppin Hot Sauce should be in a hickory farms gift Box
  • People come up to me all the time asking if they can help me
  • Civil inattention
  • Mind your own business
  • Dammit I’m mad is dammit I’m mad backwards so don’t be mad, you’re wasting your own time
return to the radio
return to the radio
Room 5100

Welcome to What’s The Matter With Me? Podcast Season Six, Episode 14, “Return To The Radio”

In this episode, I went to the first radio station staff meeting since coronavirus, something I’ve dearly missed since the start of the pandemic.

I went to the KFJC station meeting- I made my Return To The Radio! But first..

  • Lady asked to help me put my shoe on outside the big-box appliance store. I said no
  • Algorithms reduce agency- they do it for you
  • Tiger woods finished the masters, all 72 holes
  • I’ve compartmentalized a lot of stuff in my life, it works for me. Take the good with the bad
  • In The New York Times focus group, They kept defining being a man as providing for your family, but I feel like my main role in our family is a supportive one I do think that I provide for them spiritually, and since that is most important of all maybe I am providing
  • Reddit replies to Oscar’s slap
  • I went to the first KFJC staff meeting since coronavirus
  • I think it’s important to compartmentalize things and be grateful for what you have
lightning bolt cover
Seeing hardcore punk-noise veterans Lightning Bolt play at New Parish in Oakland for my first show since the start of the pandemic.

Welcome to What’s The Matter With Me? Podcast Season Six, Episode 13, “Lightning Bolt”

In this episode I got out of my house and saw a Lightning Bolt show, which was a big success. I used a ride service, ate a pre-show dinner, and hustled to the club, where they gave me a seat right next to the band.

  • Shoutouts: to the librarian who roped me into the compulsory ideas & cultural indoctrination book club!
  • I will survive my symbolic journey to Siberia as I read this book about prehistory somehow, the same book as everyone else
  • I went to see Lightning Bolt
  • Everyone in the family is out of town today
  • My wife asked me before she left, what was my menu plan? and I hadn’t thought about it
  • I made barbecued steak and spring onions yesterday- and some real hot salsa
  • I got a turkey sandwich, some beans, avocados, tortillas & cheese at the corner grocery. They have different varieties of beans down there.
  • Remember Hare Krishna’s at the airport? I guess it’s sad that the kids won’t have that
  • Social media is QVC interspersed with pictures of your friends

I went to the show

  • I used the Gogo Grandparent app which could just as easily be called Ride-O’s
  • It was around $30 round trip
  • I went to Low Bar , where I had a burger and a drink before the show
  • Brian Chippendale is hardcore drummer, as opposed to a jazz drummer
  • Lightning Bolt’s change of pace is between-song banter
  • Brian Chippendale recorded a station ID for KFJC after
  • The old ranting guy was drunk and ranting outside the club, he stood by the fire hydrant. I looked at him and realized we were the same age
  • Blue Hills by Michael Hurley was on as I put this together, it’s a new repress from Mississippi Records. he warbles a lot and the recording has many homespun touches.. you could see it as a bum trip, but I encourage thinking about with nostalgia. It’s very warm that way.
oscars slap cover
oscars slap cover
Crowd work

After that Oscars slap, what to expect when you go into a comedy club as a disabled person. PLUS, bad food, hit my head and The Dawn Of Everything.

  • I always use the wrong finger on the security sign-in on my phone, like my fingerprints all match
  • Usually, I don’t want to download any apps
  • I had the worst Mexican food – we’ll read some bad reviews
  • Fell on my butt and hit my head in the parking lot, it was scary
  • Dawn of everything book club
  • Oscars slap discussion
Affinity Group Hang cover
Affinity Group Hang cover

We had a Sunday itinerary- birthday party, BBQ and baseball practice. I am accessing my affinity group.

Welcome to What’s The Matter With Me Podcast Season 6, Episode 11 “Affinity Group Hang,” There’s lots of things going on. I’m getting out there, even further out than I was already.

  • West Elm couch backordered until August
  • The liquor store is out of things too
  • Shout outs to Kevin in Wisconsin 
    • I’ve only got anecdotal info on a stem cell treatment for a friend of a friend who had pretty severe MS. He had the stem cell treatment and was feeling great for a while, but it’s been a few years and his condition has worsened.
    • I don’t usually do something unless my doctor recommends it, because there are so many different things that people recommend that it’s pretty hard to make heads or tails of it
  • Shout outs to Brook, and to Eric & Tracy who listened to the thing on a drive, they binged it
  • Reminder to think hard about putting pee stuff in the headline
  • Ran hella errands yesterday
  • I went to the nursery with Juan and got blue fescue & abutilon
  • A movie with Daniel Day-Lewis at is a movie about a smart person
  • My recumbent bicycle is set up and I am riding it
  • When they go high, we go low
  • Sunday itinerary- birthday party, BBQ and baseball practice. The whole day was like a giant “Affinity Group Hang.” I am accessing my community
  • Shout outs to Ted Purves
New tests show T cell immunity. PLUS New pee pill prescription, indoor cycling, and lonely birria.

New tests show T cell immunity

PLUS New pee pill prescription, indoor cycling, and lonely birria

Listen to T Cell Immunity, the newest episode of the What’s The Matter With Me? Podcast.

  • Saw my neurologist
  • I have T cell immunity
  • r/multiplesclerosis
  • They prescribed me a drug for peeing oxybutinyn
  • He wants to see me virtually in 6 months, in person 6 after that, then repeat
  • Got new drink glasses at umami mart
  • My new recumbent bicycle is set up in the garage and I’m riding it
  • I made birria on a Wednesday It was depressing
  • But it smelled so good
  • I made pinto beans like it was Thanksgiving

Received: 3/14/2022 11:14 AM PDT
Dear John, This IGRA result proves you have developed Tcell immunity to the COVID coronavirus.
Great news, congratulations,
Very best of health, (name removed)

Note from my MS doctor
episode cover
episode cover

Wee Man Strikes A Chord

PLUS, disabled punks, Agnes Martin, choriço, Botox and The Red House (1947)

Infusion, short roll, little league, Temporary Services, Sunday sauce
  • We went to marina park and rode the chair around. cut too short- kids played on a zipline & swings
  • I had a runny nose and tons of sneezing yesterday and looked up, “is a runny nose a symptom of coronavirus?” and it said yes it was
  • The steroids they gave me at my infusion helped the pinched nerve in my neck
  • Randy, the disabled practitioner. (It’s not my first time working with a disabled practitioner- see “New AFO Brace”)
  • Temporary Services’ Book Waste Book
  • Spanish Wordle hole in one
  • Ate Sunday sauce and it was too rich.. it wrecked me
  • Heard a Mississippi records special on the radio. “portland art museum”
  • give thanks and praise that I may be able to produce Hoppin Hot Sauce
  • Donate to your local nonprofit community radio station- get a t shirt
  • Wee Man had friends